10:41 AM ishmael: i'm trying to figure out if it's illegal to own a horse in the city
because despite it being ridiculously cost inhibitive, how bad ass would it be to arrive everyplace on horse back?
it's like a goddamn car that drives itSELF
10:42 AM mum: yeah but think of the poop bags you would have to carry around freaken hefty bags...
10:43 AM ishmael : that i would put on enemy porches in brown paper bags and then light on fire before ringing the doorbell? are you really actually trying to deter me or....
10:44 AM mum: well it would be competition to the neighbors dog
10:44 AM ishmael: this is not a competition. i win after one bag of flaming horse shit
10:45 AM mum: true
10:45 AM ishmael: ' she got a horse. and now lights it shit on fire. on our front step. we should probably sell'
oh and you would be HAPPY to get a donkey kick, cuz donkeys? much smaller than horses
got kicked by a horse once
*once* because it's a lesson you will never ever forget
10:50 AM mum: was bit by one once...
in the bat wing of the arm...fucking hurt.
i punched it in the jowl....
then cried
10:51 AM ishmael: i am trying to process you a) getting bit by a horse and then b ) owning it's face and then c) crying?
i can see the b ) portion most clearly
and there is batmanesque ' kapow' in a thought bubble next to that image
and the horse is also wearing some ridiculous spandex outfit with a tiny matching bowler
and the forest you are in is neon
i suspect someone has spiked my camomile tea this morning
10:55 AM mum: i was like 14
10:56 AM ishmael:YOU PUNCHED A HORSE IN THE FACE
10:56 AM mum: i had long long hair the horse tried to eat it and when it came beside me it bit my arm cause i was pushing it out of my face
and then i punched the damn thing
10:57 AM ishmael: 'mum': hooray for summer, but oh man, these bangs just...
horse: chomp
mum: welcome to a WORLD of hurt, you equine asshat
you are a comic book hero
11:14 AM mum: smoke time...
11:14 AM ishmael: exactly the fuck.
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